The joys of adoption

FOR many, happiness comes in the first cry of a child. For them, joy knocked at their door.
Joshua, not his real name, was born as the fifth child to his biological mother Dina. But his mother was in a very difficult situation, had no job and could not, no matter how she wanted, take care and feed another child.

Joshua was welcomed by both Mary and Ronald (not their real name) who have been childless for about five years when he was brought to their home in Pavia, Iloilo.

Joshua came in the perfect time. It was like that the couple has been waiting for his arrival since their marriage.

Mary, a teacher by profession, and Ronald, a seafarer, have worked out to have their own biological baby a year after their marriage. However, as years passed by, the idea of having their child seemed to have drifted away.

“Sometime in January 2010, our family driver asked me if I’m interested in adopting a baby boy.  We then decided to adopt him. We brought him home on February 2, 2010. Life has changed at our house but for us it seems only for the better. Words cannot  express  the happiness and love we have in our family,” said Mary.

According to Mary, they began the adoption process on the same year with the help of DSWD. 

Mary described their experience of working out to have their own child as “a lost hope.” “Years passed and there was no pregnancy. We did all we could to have children. People would be asking if I’m already pregnant or why I’m not yet pregnant. Some would tell me to relax and stop thinking about it. They said I was just too stressed and anxious. Well, that stressed me out and made me think about it more because I wasn’t supposed to be thinking about it.”

She said they consulted a fertility specialist. Many visits followed but “at each appointment we’d go with hope that this was going to be our answer. This doctor would be able to help us have a baby. But each time, we left with a little less hope.”

After they started the legal adoption process, about a year passed, she got pregnant and gave birth to a baby girl. Joshua is now the big brother of her two-year-old sister Nikki.

Mary said that she has now realized that their heart was already being prepared to adopt a child long before Joshua came.

“I was created with this longing in my heart to nurture. I began to think that maybe my longing was misguided. Maybe there was something else I was supposed to do, someone else, besides a child of my own, that I was supposed to take care of,” she said.

“Looking back, I see that at that time, I wanted a child for very selfish reasons, as if God owed it to me. I think God required something else from us. He wanted a testimony of faithfulness through our experiences,” Mary added.

She said that she cannot imagine her life without Joshua in it. “He is a big blessing to our family. He is a very loving and caring kid. Indeed, if you show love to your child, love also radiates from them,” she said.

She thanked DSWD for the assistance given to her. Now awaiting for the final decision for the legal adoption, she often tells Joshua how much she loves him.

“We had thought of simulating the birth certificate since it was not yet processed by that time but after a talk with the lawyer, we were advised otherwise. Everytime there was an update regarding the adoption, the DSWD social worker (Melin Gerona) called us. Thank you DSWD for the part you all played in creating our family,” she said./dswd6/May Grecia-Rago

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